Parenting Guide

Parenting Guide

Steps for Creating Your Own Routines

Our four-step feedback loop can help you create practical routines for your daily life. In addition, it will help you replace ineffective behavioral patterns with more useful patterns of interacting with your child, making life easier for you both!

Feedback Loop:
1. Remember
2. Act
3. Reward
4. Repetition


• Be proactive. Identify difficult separations or transitions in which a routine could help you and your child such as bedtime, daycare, tantrums, etc.

• Create a routine with your child to help ease these difficult situations or transitions.

• Choose a specific trigger or visual cue to help remind you and your child of the routine.

• Aim to be as consistent as possible with your routine.

2. ACT

• Prepare your child for the routine by using simple words that clearly explain what she can expect.

• Select a place for the routine.

• Allow an appropriate amount of time for the routine— not too much or too little. Your child will take cues from you.

• Keep it fun. And remember, if you’re calm, your child will be more likely to stay calm and feel safe.

• If your child is having a particularly difficult time, add a ritual.


• When you create a positive behavioral cycle, both you and your child will feel more in control and connected.


• Success feels good. You’ll want to repeat the action the next time the opportunity comes up.

• Over time, the behavior becomes more automatic. Each reassuring repetition draws you and your child closer.

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