Parenting Guide

Parenting Guide

Making Up After Mistakes

A Mix-Up, Fix-Up Model for Reconnecting with Your Child

“Experience is simply the name we give our mistakes.”


  • Everyone Makes Mistakes

    You do everything you can to be an amazing parent, but nobody’s perfect. No matter how sensitive, attuned, and attentive you are, you and your child are bound to have some misunderstandings. Given that you are a human being, you might even make mistakes in your parenting. These moments are formally called “misattunements” (we call…

  • Examples of a Mix-Up and Fix-Up

    Susan takes her twelve-month-old, Jackie, to the park to play in the sand. Susan gets a phone call that distracts her from playing with Jackie. After a while, Jackie feels ignored, becomes fussy, and starts to cry. Susan gets off the phone quickly, but has a hard time calming Jackie. How can Susan make things…

  • Resources for Further Reading

    Cori, J. L. (2010). The emotionally absent mother: A guide to self-healing and getting the love you missed. New York, NY: The Experiment. Tronick, E. & Beeghly, M. (2011). Infants’ meaning-making and the development of mental health problems. American psychologist, 66(2), 107-119. Winnicott, D.W. (1965). The maturational processes and the facilitating environment: Studies in…

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