Resources for Further Reading

Winnicott, D.W. (1965). The maturational processes and the facilitating environment: Studies in the theory of emotionaldevelopment. Madison, CT: International Universities Press.

Helpful Tips for Managing Tantrums

Tantrums are emotional meltdowns. Your child cannot think during a tantrum, and you cannot reason with her until she calms down. Parental Attitudes • Remember your child’s age and stage. Have realistic expectations. • Do not take your child’s words or behavior personally. Your child’s tantrum is not a reflection on you or on your […]

Suggestions for Preventing Tantrums

Choose your battles wisely. • Go ahead and give in a little sometimes, so that your child has a healthy sense of control. Key words are “a little sometimes”; giving your child too much control will only increase tantrums. • Acknowledge or thank your child when she manages frustration or cooperates. Set your child up […]

Understanding Tantrums

Temper tantrums are a normal part of your child’s development. You may dread tantrums because you feel scared, confused, or even embarrassed by these sudden outbursts. Unfortunately, you can’t avoid them, so strengthen your endurance. Understand that tantrums are a way for your child to overcome frustrations and intense emotions. Being out of control is […]

Talking Tantrums

Preventing and Managing Those Dreaded Meltdowns “Do not teach your children never to be angry; teach them how to be angry.” – LYMAN ABBOTT

Resources for Further Reading

Pacella, B. L. (n.d.). Limit setting / discipline. Retrieved from Poarch, J.E. (1990). Limits: The keystone of emotional growth. Muncie, IN: Accelerated Development Inc. Runkel, H. E. (2008). Screamfree parenting: The revolutionary approach to raising your kids by keeping your cool. New York, NY: Broadway Books

About Time-Outs

• Don’t introduce time-outs too soon. Only introduce time-outs to very young children when necessary. Time-outs can create fear and anxiety in very young children, so you should always reinforce connection rather than separation. • Do not use time-outs to punish. A time-out should not be a punishment, but instead a time to pause. This […]

More Tips for Parents

• Match your voice to the moment. Use a tone of voice that matches the limit you are trying to set for your child. Children are sensitive to tone of voice. Don’t use a strong tone for setting a minor limit – it can confuse your child. • Tell, don’t ask. Use statements rather than […]

How to Establish Limits and Boundaries

• Always take your child’s temperament and developmental level into account. Use simple language for younger children, and consider whether your expectations are reasonable for your child’s age and stage. • Make your limits clear, firm, and consistent. Then your child will know what to expect. • Stay calm. Speak and act calmly, even if […]

Why are Limits and Boundaries Important?

Loving your child means having to set limits. You can’t let a two-year-old rule your house. You may cringe at the idea because you don’t like struggling with your child, but clear rules help your child feel safe and learn self-regulation. Your child’s ability to say no, control his impulses, and delay gratification will have […]